Dennis Parker, aged 58, had what we would call a hard life.  One of 12 siblings, his father died in a tragic accident when he was just five years old.  I don’t know what his education was like but we know he couldn’t read or write much.  He lost an eye at the age of 19 when, working in a cement factory, another lad thought it would be funny to throw lime in his face.  Dennis was married once and had two children – a boy (Edward) and a girl, both of whom were taken into care.  Sadly he had lost touch with them.  At some point in his working life he fell off a skip and badly hurt his back.  Dennis got into a lot of trouble and had been in prison a few times for minor offences.  Dennis was such a trusting person and sadly, people took advantage of him.  He smoked and drank heavily all his 58 years.  Dennis never got over the death of his beloved mum.

Dennis moved to Bath in December 2005.  He was on the protection programme after witnessing his best friend getting shot and testifying against some pretty nasty characters – an event that haunted his dreams and many of his waking moments. There were times when his memories became too much for him to bear, and he would let his defenses down.  With a tear in his eye he we would hold hands and he would ask God for peace and forgiveness.  I have no doubt that in those precious moments, Dennis connected deeply with a loving and merciful God.

It is true to say that Dennis was living to escape a past he was desperately trying to forget.  However, Bath was a happy place for him and he had a quality of life here.   At the age of 55, he had made a fresh start.  He was immensely grateful to the Twerton community for accepting him and loving him – something he had rarely experienced in his life.  It was this love and acceptance that gave him the space and encouragement to start life again.  Dennis started to blossom.  He loved his friends at the Full Moon Pub and found a real sense of love and belonging at Rose Cottage.  He helped out his neighbours and at different times volunteered at the City Farm and for Time Bank.  A few days before he died, his support worker Kirsten asked him how he was, and he replied, “Top of the world.”

During the past few years Dennis lived life to the full.   When he ate a meal, it was the best meal he ever ate.  When he described something he liked, he didn’t just like it, he absolutely bloody loved it.  When he introduced someone, it was as his best mate or top gal.  He made many of us smile and seemed always to have an encouraging word to say.  He made all of us feel good about ourselves.  Dennis’s story was of a life redeemed.  Yes, he still felt a pain he felt he needed to drown out – and he still messed up from time to time – but it was as if, on the inside, all the heaviness that he had carried all his life was being lifted from his shoulders and he was a child again.

I wonder if, when we meet Dennis again, whether we will recognize him.   There won’t be lines of worry on his brow, sunken eyes from a lifetime of booze, fags and regrets.  His joints will be strong.  A young cockney lad will bounce up to us, look us in they eye and greet us as if we are his best friend, his top bloke, his favourite gal.

We will all miss you Dennis.  You didn’t have much in this world but your presence made our lives just a bit richer.  Thanks mate.

Memories

My memory of Dennis was when he wanted to sing on karaoke.  He made me stand next to him and read the words out for him just so he could have a go as he couldn’t read.  He always wanted to join in everything that was going on and was the life and soul of the party.  He was a big part of The Full Moon and will be greatly missed.  Love Sam.

My mate Dennis could always have a joke with the lads and could take a joke.  He was always very polite to people, and never really had a bad word to say to anybody.  He will be dearly missed as a friend and an all-round good bloke.  From Paul.

I felt so sad when I heard about the passing away of Dennis.  We were just beginning to get to know him.  He was a great character, very kind and thoughtful.  He was always very pleased to see us and he would great each of the ladies with a kiss.  It’s a shame we didn’t get to hear more about his life as a younger man – that would have been good to hear.  Dennis will be great up there with Jesus.  Love Pauline.

Dennis was a great man and was always there to help anyone out.  He was a good friend to a lot of people and will be missed by everyone.  From Lee.

Sadly missed.  Good man.  “Brandy”  Love Dave and family.

In the short time he was at Pennard Court, Dennis made a big impact.  He was so friendly to everyone and everybody loved him.  We will miss him.  Love Christine.

You were such a great laugh.  I will miss your Elvis moves.  Love Shirley and the kids.

I did not know Dennis for long, but in the time I did know him, I developed a good friendship with him.  Dennis was a gentleman – he helped others and enjoyed his life. The last few months of Dennis’s life were filled with care and love.  He died knowing that he was loved.  Who can ask for more.  Rest in peace Dennis.  Love Julie.

I remember Dennis as the life and soul of every party we ever had, especially when he dressed as Elvis for a friends hen party – he loved going in the limo with all the girls.  He was always kind and polite to people and always bought things for kids at bonfire night and Christmas.  He will be sadly missed.  His friend, Glen and familiy.